To best illustrate how an alienator and narcissist thinks and acts I am linking to some prose by Karen Woodall

 She is a Trans-generational Family Therapist working with families affected by Parental Alienation. Link to her website here.

I am linking to a piece she wrote called “ I am the alienator”

Other articles from her website.

When children reject you using empathy to challenge the alienation process

Preparing for emphatic responding with an alienated child.

The hell a targeted parent endures

by Isobel E Richard.

I want to tell you more about how it feels to a parent who has lost their children through alienation. This is abuse by proxy, when the narcissist programs your children to abuse you therefore abusing you indirectly. This is an abnormal phenomenon that those that have not actually experienced it cannot fathom in their wildest dreams.

You are grieving the death of a child who is not dead. You are grieving that relationship with your child that was there but in a matter of days/months changed to venom, hatred and distrust for no reason whatsoever. You are living an all-encompassing nightmare that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. You start doubting your very sanity and reality.  And yet you know deep down you have done nothing wrong and you feel as if you have been thrust into the very pit of hell.

Targeted parents have to endure a hurt that goes beyond any, the only other parents that I think could fathom our type of hurt would be parents whose children have disappeared, who do not know whether they are alive or dead.  Parents who have actually lost their children to death can at least find closure, we never can. We have to endure indifference, hatred, criticism and no contact or very little contact from the children we love and care for.

Ours is an enduring grief with a little hope always tucked away that our children will see the light one day and realize and seek us out. But we all know we have lost that specific time with them, the sharing of special moments in their lives gone forever, we cannot turn back time so we wish and hope for glimmers of acceptance and a rebuilding of a relationship which has been tarnished forever by what has been done to them. This is the ULTIMATE abuse, the wrecking of loving relationships and lives of the children and the targeted parent.